I grew up being told, “A man should never hit a woman.” This was mostly programmed into my young self by people on my mother’s side. They are a fine mix of German and Native American ancestry. And when you add in Catholicism and alcoholism, you have a fine mix indeed. Growing up, there were very few family gatherings with that side that didn’t involve someone getting pissed at someone else and some kind of knock-down-drag-out hurricane happening either in the house or the front yard. It was rarely between men or between women, but almost invariably between men and women – if that makes any sense. So, like, my mother and step-father or my grandmother and grandfather. Never (or very rarely) between, say, my uncles.
So, I always found it interesting that the people who beat on each other the most were the ones preaching the most about how evil it was to do just that. That’s how it goes, though. Right?
A few weeks ago I saw a video online about an incident that happened on a subway. Someone recorded the whole bit on his phone (he makes a stupid appearance in the video) and the video shows a pretty brazen young woman who seems to have lost control over her own tongue. I don’t know how much of what happened before the recording started, or how much continued beyond the recording, but the meat of it seems to amount to the aforementioned gal running her mouth rudely, confronting a number of people in the process but focusing primarily on one guy in particular, and then the climax is reached when she smacks him “upside” his head and he returns in like manner. Of course, when he does all hell breaks loose. The video is below for your viewing.
Before I continue allow me to make something VERY clear: Hitting anyone is never acceptable. This is true regardless of gender or race or … you name it.
With that in mind, I hesitate to say she had it coming to her – but didn’t she? I mean, as a Hindu this is a very clear and immediate depiction of how karma works. I’ll admit that it’s a pretty simplistic example, which in the past I’ve shied away from for fear that others would understand such simplicity as all-encompassing. But in this case, with these people on the subway, the energetic exchange seems fairly straight-forward.
Things often, in many contexts, build up to a boiling point and then pop. As I said, who knows what didn’t make it to into the video, but it’s clear that this woman was an instigator throughout. For the bulk of the video, you almost cant even tell exactly who she’s directing her ridiculousness toward and I feel that’s partly to do with him remaining so low-key about it all. While she showed her ass, he seems to at least try to stay controlled. Judging by his stature, he clearly could have done much more than simply pop her in the mouth / face.
Isn’t that what the Universe does to us sometimes? The human previously known as The Best has been whacked in the face a time or two by the Universe. It sucks a whole bag of bumpily dicks, but it’s a necessary wake up call sometimes. Right? And I think, if a person who’s been whopped by the Universe once or twice looks back with reason and maturity, they would humbly admit things like they had it coming, they were out of control, they needed the wake up call (or smack).
Violence is never okay. Plain and simple. But all universal wake up lashings aside, why does gender have to come into the equation at all? In my view, it’s not MORE wrong for a man to hit a woman than it would be for a woman to hit a man. Growing up in a family where 50% of my blood relatives engaged in violence almost regularly, I can say that both genders are equally – and I do mean equally – capable of creating pain. Naturally the same is to be said about receiving pain, as well. The man in question shouldn’t have done what he did, but what about her role in what she received? Does / should that actually have anything at all to do with gender?
Aum Shri Mahaganeshaya Namaha