Samadhi Samadhi

 

(This post was created on 20141220 – but I am only just now getting the chance to publish it.)

Today has meant an unexpected flurry of emails and communication among the Sahaj Marg community – our beloved and revered master has left his body. My math is probably a little off, but the passing happened around 11:15 this morning (local time).

For anyone who’s been around long enough, our guru-ji’s health struggles were no secret. He was up in his years and his health had been somewhat of a roller coaster – periods of illness and infection followed by good health and recovery. This is natural for all humans as they age and it seems to me that the biggest threat to an old human’s physical existence can be the smallest and most mundane occurrence that most of us who are younger take for granted.

My own grandfather was weakened by very concerning health issues, but what had at once threatened his life in a very real way was something that I could easily catch and overcome in a week or less and hardly miss a beat. My guru, Shri Parthasarathi Rajagopalachari (Chariji Maharaj) was very much in line with Nature’s way where this was concerned – and very fitting, too, because one of our Maxims calls us to be in harmony with Nature and to be simple as Nature is simple. I think (and perhaps I’m mistaken) that it had been some years since his health was enough of a threat that we thought he might leave.

This year, however, was very clearly a time of battle for his health. For any abhyasis who subscribe to the Sahaj Sandesh e-newsletter, we were updated as often as was necessary to keep us informed and in a prayerful / meditative condition regarding our master. Just yesterday, a Sandesh was released with a statement from Dr. Sharma indicating that our guru had been very ill for the last two weeks – first with respiratory infection and then / also a urinary infection. His condition was called “worrying and similar to what it was in 2012.”

The hint that things were actually quite serious, and that master may not survive, came in statements from the same Sandesh telling us that the doctors are doing everything possible to help him through it physically, but that there is a spiritual aspect that cannot be treated with medications.

Fortunately, preparations for this day were started long ago and Chariji’s successor has already been appointed. As I understand it, Brother Kamlesh Patel will be the new master of Sahaj Marg. Hopefully, this will alleviate, if not eliminate, any discord our guru’s passing may stir among abhyasis – as happened when the last master left his body.

While I have at times felt particularly drawn to Sahaj Marg’s earlier masters, Chariji is the only one I’ve ever known. In regard to the Marg’s literature, Chariji is, by far, the most prolific author of all the masters and as a result he is the one I’ve learned the most from and in the most direct way.

I’m including a video of Chariji here, which I’ve posted here to Sthapati before. The video is of him talking about our practice of spiritual transmission (which in some ways links our practice to Sufism). For those of us who are more familiar with master, so much more is evident even in this video than just the words that are being said.

I suspect that we’ll hear from Chariji from the Brighter World. Soon enough, his whispers may be coming to us to offer continued guidance in addition to the leadership brought by Kamlesh-ji.

Tonight, and everywhere across the globe, abhyasis and prefects are holding a sitting. Our ashrams everywhere are opening for this purpose and those who are not near an ashram or are not able to go to one are encouraged to sit from their homes or wherever they are.

 

Aum Tryambakam Yajamahe – Sugandhim Pushtivardahanam – Urvarukam Iva Bandhanan – Mrtyor Mukshiya Maa Amrtat

 

I’ll share a quote here from my grand-master, Babuji Maharaj in a book titled “Spiritual Training.” I feel, when things like this happen, it’s important to keep one’s compass pointed in the right direction. This quote was emailed out right before Chariji’s passing. I find it encouraging and speaks a bit on the essence of the Sahaj Marg practice. — “God is simple and can be achieved by equally simple means. The hard and fast rules of life and tiring practices prescribed by teachers for realisation have really made matters so complicated that people are led to believe it to be beyond their power and capacity. I may assure you very sincerely that realisation is not at all a difficult thing, only if you earnestly divert your attention to it. Iron will to achieve the goal, together with proper means and guidance, is the only thing required for the complete success.”

On a quite personal note this is a very challenging time for me. The 2014 year has been just about the worst year in memory (although it’s also held some of the very best moments!) and with everything else on my plate, including the recent loss of my birth mother, I really could have done without the passing of Chariji. To say he will be missed is such an understatement it’s practically inappropriate.

Aum Shri Mahaganeshaya Namaha

Aum Shanti

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Additional notes to be added since the above was written:

Last night I found myself able to attend the global satsangh that was held shortly after master’s passing. Local abhyasis gathered at our prefects’ home and a sitting was given. The crowd was smallish but the sitting was incredible, no less. At least three distinct times I felt waves of master’s divine transmission wash over me. The first two nearly knocked me out of my asana. When the sitting was over, we were allowed a few moments to bask in the transmission and I unexpectedly found myself smiling. Unknowingly, I had secured a seat about 10 feet diagonally across a nice framed photo of my recently deceased master, himself in his meditation asana. On a table behind where this photo had been placed, was another table with framed photos on it and on that table was a photo of master that I think I’d purchased online and framed and donated to whomever would want it. The photo looked a little familiar, but the frame itself was very familiar. As my prefects’ home serves as the closest ashram to me, it warmed my heart to see something (I think) I had contributed to the local community. After the sitting was over, the prefect who had given the sitting read from a book called “Devotion” a number of snip-its. As someone who had been in master’s presence many times in the past decades, it was clear to see how his death had affected her. I did my best to hug her with my heart from where I sat. This year, as well as many of the recent years, has left me quite familiar with death and what it means. Strangely, I am nearly completely comfortable with it, but one thing that stings me each time I have a brush with death is the pain I see on the faces of others – that pain is the sad part of death for me and it was very clear that my prefect’s heart was hurting a bit as she read to us and then shared a story about the last time she was in master’s presence.

An extended satsangh was held this morning but I didn’t attend. I wanted to because I knew there would be discussed things that might answer some of the questions I have now, and it was mentioned that a few videos would be shared – which I really wanted to view. But I couldn’t bring myself. Instead, and this has been mostly true since learning of master’s passing, I sat alone in meditation. The heart knows what it wants, and that’s what my heart has sought increasingly as this year winds down to a close.

An email was issued this morning saying that Chariji would be cremated tomorrow in the morning.

Lastly, I mentioned in the main portion of this post that I imagined Chariji would be speaking to us from the Brighter World – and he has spared no time! This morning a message was received. I’m not sure it would be appropriate to share the whisper here, but I can say that it was a welcome greeting this morning!

Thanks

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Heavy as Clay

You never know what experience meditation might bring in Sahaj Marg. Many times I come out of meditation or leave a sitting thinking, “Holy cow!” We’re encouraged to journal, and I often log these experiences in my journal – as best I am able, given that the right words often escape me. Still, occassionally I am able to express these experiences in words that seem at least mostly adequate. This is rare, though.

Recently, and more than once, I have experienced something that may well be called a vision, although that term doesn’t seem to fit as neatly as it should because I’m not seeing anything in my mind’s eye so much as “seeing”” through a type of feeling.

I recall from my early years while I was a Christian stories about the first human being created from clay. Anyone who’s worked with clay before can attest to the general heaviness of the material. Until a few meditative experiences recently, I’d never before felt so very…. made of clay.

In Sahaj Marg, one will find much emphasis on subtlety and subtleness. Our practices and texts are filled with subtlety and emphasis on it. During our meditative efforts, it’s not unusual to experience increased subtleness from within where the inner landscapes are being tended. Despite knowing this, in something like 3 or 4 years of following the Sahaj Marg (mostly on, with a little off) these recent experiences are relatively new to me. I’ve almost always known and understood the physical body to be gross and dense (mind you, in a purely physical sense the body is actually mostly a grouping of water and empty space, but the perspective shifts when we consider the nature of physical forms in relation to the non-physical world and its experiences), but lately coming out of meditation has been fairly…. bothersome and a time or two, almost painful. I “return” and sometimes think to myself, “Damn. I’m heavy!”

It’s not entirely unlike going to the gym or doing a workout at home and later feeling a little sore in the areas you worked out. All possible injury aside, that kind of pain is good and understood to be a sign of progress. I’m not sure what, if anything, this kind of meditative experience says about my progress spiritually and as a human person, but it feels encouraging. Surely one of the best aspects of this path is, in addition to these kinds of proofs, the encouragement Shri Guru offers motivates us to re-enter the world as the grihastas we are and to perform this dharma to the best grihasta ability.

As we’re now encased in the perfect weather of our Spring season, a season I find to be filled with balance (hot AND cold temps, rainy AND sunny days, etc…), it’s my wish for you that you should similarly find the balance perfect for you, both in this world and the Brighter World.

Aum Shri Mahaganeshaya Namaha
Aum Shanti

Let Go & Let Who?

It’s often heard in Christian circles that one should, “Let go and let God” meaning that we should place everything in God’s hands and trust the Divine to take care of us. I think the best equivalent I’ve encountered in anything Islamic is the saying, “If it is written” or “If God has written it” … something to that effect, implying that the Divine is in control and that we should trust in what is written above. I’ve even heard many a Hindu believer advise something along these lines.

It’s always made me scratch my head. I suppose to many it’s comforting to believe that our Big Daddy / Big Momma has our back, but there seems also to be something weakening about that idea, if it’s carried far enough. For me, strictly in the context of this saying, the value it holds can be found primarily in the idea that there is more going on than we are able to see or understand. I don’t believe God wants me to lay my worries down at his so-called feet. I don’t believe God punishes my enemies or rewards me for being a good boy. Most of those things, which are often covered under the “let go and let God” phrase are actually governed by the deep workings of karma.

Still, there’s value in being able to “let go.” Whether God enters the picture or not, we need to be able to let go. Shri Eckhart Tolle mentions in a number of his books that our mind likes to recycle stories because the ego feeds off the energy carried by those stories. First-hand experience has shown me how absolutely true this actually is. Often these stories are negative, but happy stories apply here as well.

Hinduism holds the notion of Samskaras. One meaning of this term is passage or rite. These are ceremonies that are milestones in one’s human life. Another definition of the word Samskara is “impression” or “under the impulse of previous impressions,” and The Dictionary of Common Sanskrit Spiritual Words says, “Whenever an action is performed with the desire for a specific result (whether for oneself or another), sanskara is created for that person. These accumulate and determine the situations with which we will be presented in the future and will influence the scope of future actions.”

As you can see, Samskaras play a huge role in our karmas – or lack thereof. Something happens, it makes an impression on us, and then additional things that happen are flavored by the existing impressions as are our responses to those additional happenings. We end up with really strong, deeply-engrained, cycles of energy that can be quite challenging to gain mastery over.

Hinduism offers just about as many ways for gaining this mastery as there are Hindu believers. Whether one is effective or “right” depends almost entirely on the individual and – big surprise – their Samskaras. For some of us, mantra yoga removes the impressions we carry. For others of us, karma yoga is the route. Many find liberation through experiential Jnana Yoga, while others seek freedom by performing decade-long headstands. In the Sahaj Marg, a Raja Yoga path, we have a practice known as Cleaning, which supplements our primary meditation practice.

Image taken from Google Image search

Cleaning is something I struggled to accept when I first encountered this path, but it has since grown on me as a productive and beneficial part of my daily sadhana. Without going too deep into it, it’s something that an abhyasi does only after their “work” for the day is complete. Beyond that, it can be done any time one prefers or needs. (The guidelines that govern our primary meditation practice are considerably more stringent.) The photo included in this post, while not an actual Sahaj Marg image, is actually a great illustration of our practice of cleaning.

So what does this have to do with that jibber-jabber “let go and let God”? I suppose the point I hoped to make is that one’s path should be empowering. In Hinduism, the Law of Karma actually affords all the power and control to the individual. Your destiny is what YOU make it, not the result of God cradling you. Here’s another thing all Hindus must consider: God is you. You are literally a spark or sliver of the Divine. So when you “let go and let God” you must realize you’re essentially allowing yourself the power and strength to get rid of that which brings or perpetuates your misery.

My experience has definitely shown me that I am the cause of my own misery and, as a spark of the Divine, I am also imbued with the power and strength to be the end of that same misery. Whatever your chosen path is, I hope you’re increasingly capable of letting go and letting God within you be the One you look to for peace.

Aum Shri Mahaganeshaya Namaha
Aum Shanti

कोई मन नहीं

I’ve written before about how important it is to me that any idea of God that I entertain be as far from human-like as it can get. It’s been part of the pull I have for Ganesha versus others who appear more human. And while I understand that the majority of our believing population needs something minds can wrap around, I remain of the opinion that anything a mind can wrap around is immensely too limited to be very much of God. For this and other reasons, I’ve always used the Vedic words, “Neti, neti…” as a guiding light.

As humans, with minds and egos, the minute we begin saying what God is we naturally and automatically begin trying to build a circumference of sorts around what we think we know God to be. This happens in every religion to some degree or another. It can be said that for some religions it’s the entire foundation of belief.

In the Sahaj Marg, I think in part to engage in the stilling of our mind’s waves, we essentially limit ourselves in how we “see” God. There’s mention of divine light and “the subtlest of the subtle,” but beyond that we’re discouraged from clinging too closely at all to forms of the divine that are terribly finite and I have actually experienced this to be surprisingly liberating – which is, of course, the aim of the practice.

In reading the words of our current and living maharaj I came across words that resonated with me. I’m not sure if I’ve shared this exact quote of his before, but like a few others, I’m sure there will be many who disagree. (Interestingly, in this day and age of Kali, I’m increasingly convinced that almost anything different from the bulk of humanity is a fine thing, indeed. We’re a fairly fucked-up group of organisms.) The words I just referenced are shared below.

“God – no mind, no heart – cannot love human beings, and cannot love anything else. He is love, but he cannot love. We, on the other end of the spectrum – we can love, but we are not love. Therefore comes this, you know, blindingly illuminating concept that we have not to love, but to become Love.”

I think for practical and linguistic purposes employed in basic human existence, we can say that God loves everyone. And certainly if we do say God loves everyone then it should be made clear that God loves everyone equally. However, I genuinely believe that God loves no one. I also genuinely believe that God has no mind and no heart, as the quote indicates. We humans have hearts and minds and we definitely think and love. But God IS love, right? If God is love, then God cannot love. Otherwise, we could say that a fire “fires,” which doesn’t make sense. Instead, we say that a fire burns or heats or warms. So either God loves but isn’t love, or God is love but doesn’t love. Most agree that humans are not love, yet are capable of loving intensely. I believe God is love and I believe humans become That by loving. It’s a simple and very deep sadhana.

Aum Shri Mahaganeshaya Namaha
Aum Shanti

Intentional Jinx

Taken from Google Image search

I think I believe in jinxes. They’re not rational, but still. Any time I’ve shared that I’ve applied for a job or interviewed for one, I don’t get it. I keep my mouth shut, however, and I’m signing an offer letter before I know it. People announce that they’re quitting smoking – and fail. I’ve known a few who tackled this task quietly, and obtained healthy success. I mention to anyone that I’m rededicating myself to time at the gym and it’s invariably at least a month before I step through the doors. I sneak in without so much as a peep, and the next thing I know I’ve gone nearly every day for three months solid and seeing results.

There’s something different… special… powerful… about just getting to work and making it (whatever that might be) happen.

Periodically, I take a bigger view of my life than I already often do and make an assessment. I can remember the first couple times I attempted this, I pretty much failed. But getting back on the old horse is part of learning how to ride, so I kept with the effort and now when times of assessment hit me, they’re productive and more balanced / reasonable.

For me, the last seven days (today, Saturday, being the seventh) has been another period of assessment. I find this interesting and frustrating because my best had been hospitalized for numerous days, I’m wrapping up a class right now and have tons due, shopping season is evaporating as I write this (and I’ve yet to buy a thing!), I am moving into yet another position at work which means intense focus / learning, and I’ve gone on less sleep per night each night this week than I have in I-don’t-know-how-long. Of all the times to be adding something else to my plate – especially something like one of my “assessments” – this would surely be about the worst. No?

There have been a few times in the past when, post assessment, I’ve arrived at some conclusions and have mentioned those to some or all. Then, other times, I’ve arrived at a decision or two not related to any kind of so-called assessment and have still opened my mouth about it all. Mostly, at least within the narrow contexts of my self-assessments, I’ve not been jinxed. I’ll admit some decisions / conclusions here and there were short-lived in contrast to others. But I don’t really see those as failures so much as just proof that it wasn’t really a conclusion that I’d come to, after all. Further, in some cases I think those instances are evidence that I’ve evolved a bit from that point.

After these last seven days, I blissfully (and much-needed-ly) slept in this morning and when I awoke I had new knowledge, well almost a feeling really. Nothing dark-n-wondrous or ground-splitting, but definitely game-changing. Almost a new perspective. Certain things will be different moving forward, although I think I’ll choose not to reveal those right now.

I’d hate to jinx anything. (Or have I already?)

Aum Shri Mahaganeshaya Namaha
Aum Shanti

Sahaj Marg, The Breakdown

Sometime late last year, December-ish, I found myself in a psychology class.

Before continuing, I’d like to assert that only “psychos” go into psychology. I know this is likely an unfair statement, and certainly an over-generalization. I should also admit that there are moments, sometimes daily, when I think my own sanity must be mere minutes from leaving me for good. Many very educated people I know claim that virtually every psych professional they’ve know is in some way or another… off. The suspicion is that people with psych problems tend to enter that industry as part of some deep-rooted desire to figure their own selves (problems) out, and of course, help others in the process. Projection, which is illegal, happens all too often.

Back to the psychology class. The faculty teaching this class is an incredible person. She has life experience I’m glad I don’t have. The result is that her perspective is… interesting. She clearly adores psychology and all it entails. She certainly enjoyed teaching the class. I could truly write a book about her, but that’s not the point of this post. She is, however, relevant to this post because she’s the reason I encountered the Natural Path-formally and officially known as Sahaj Marg. We were actually doing a few ice breakers at the start of the class, one of which was to discuss one of the meditative techniques we had researched and tried prior to the class’s start. To be level with us, she shared similarly about herself. The meditative practice she mentioned was Sahaj Marg. I went home that night and looked into it. After only a day or two of poking around online and taking notes on everything I read, I made an online request to be contacted by a local representative.

When someone shows interest, the contact to them is initiated by someone called a Preceptor.

The preceptor who contacted me was an intelligent and charming woman named Jan. However, Jan was then about to head out of town and so she put me in touch with her husband, a tall and handsome man, and also a Preceptor. He and I met at a Starbucks shortly thereafter. During that chat we discussed the Sahaj Marg in general, and also he did well answering most of my questions at that point. Below is the digest version of what I learned during my preliminary study and in meeting with that Preceptor.

1. Practitioners of Sahaj Marg are known as Abhyasis. Abhyas means concentration, and is actually an applicable title for followers of this path.
2. The practice itself is a branch of Raja Yoga and essentially encompasses/simplifies Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras, and the goals of the Yamas and Niyamas through a specialized and summarized meditation practice which is centered in the area of the heart chakra.
3. In addition to the practice of abhyas/meditation, the path employs the unique practice of “cleaning.” This is essentially a visualization practice during which the abhyasi perceives the day’s impression (samskaras) as leaving the body through the upper back/shoulder area in the form of smoke or vapor.
4. Each person interested in becoming an abhyasi must undergo a minimum of three consecutive initiatory “sittings” with a Preceptor, during which the Cleaning Process is initiated as well as the beginning of Pranahuti, also known as Transmission, in which a bond with the current Master is established. Pranahuti is kind of like shaktipat, but entirely more subtle.

All of this sounded interesting enough, and while I’m not racist in the least, I should admit that it was kind of nice to be introduced to something like this by a non-Indian. In all my other spiritual pursuits, like 96% of all of them, I’m the only non-Indian. It truly doesn’t bother me, but it does perpetually feel rather lonely. At the end of the Starbucks meeting, I told this Preceptor that I’d be in touch about scheduling my initiatory sittings. I did just that.

As it turns out, this husband-wife Preceptor pair hosts much of the group’s local activities in their home, which isn’t new, but is nice. Their main living area actually makes for a very nice “sanctuary” with its enormous windowed space and near-panoramic view of their backyard.

After the initiatory sittings, there’s a prescribed manner of practice each abhyasi is encouraged to maintain including morning meditation, “cleaning” when the day’s work is done, and evening prayer. Additionally, there are a number of writings by the Marg’s lineage of Masters available for the abhyasi to study. Probably the most known of these are the Ten Maxims…which are not like the Ten Commandments.

Once their foot is in the door, so to speak, abhyasis are encouraged to do sittings with a Preceptor something like twice monthly. This is in addition to the individual cleaning one should be doing on his own. The benefit of this is that, if the abhyasi is diligent with his own cleaning it makes for increased progress in cleaning when he sits for such with his Preceptor.

The heart-based meditation is actually quite sweet, although it can be challenging to get a good hold on. It’s like picturing something without actually picturing it. The verbiage I feel is often used in this context is supposition. One “supposes” the existence of this Light, without actually picturing it. Apparently, picturing it too concretely will lead to kind of idolizing an image of this Light and this will, in its own way, deter the potential progress of the abhyasi. It’s for this reason that, although this practice comes from a Hindu background, no murtis are employed or encouraged.

Another aspect of Sahaj Marg is their use of journaling. All abhyasis are encouraged to do some post-meditative journaling as a means of logging their meditation experiences or realizations.

So far, in its relatively short lifespan, the Sahaj Marg has experienced three Masters (known respectively as Lalaji, Babuji, and Chariji), and the fourth was recently designated. I feel like a Google search has turned up some interesting tidbits about the Sahaj Marg, including that it’s a cult, that Preceptors at times force abhyasis to share their journals, a sex scandal or two, and disagreements in regard to the succession of some of the past Masters, among others. I’ll speak more about these things in my next post, when I detail my actual experience with the path.

My apologies for this post being so long. I intended to lay out a foundational understanding of as much of Sahaj Marg practice as possible, so that in my next post I can speak as much as possible about my specific experience with the path and not have as much explaining to so.

Om Shanti